My Morning in Madea's World

A year or two ago, I was introduced to the incredibly funny, yet poignant, Madea movies. Today, I lived for a moment in the world of Madea.

My dear friend and coworker, Beth, invited me to her son Cameron's pre-school graduation, which took place this morning. It was a fun little affair that was attended by dozens of people, including me and Beth's friend, Lynn. Lynn is a cracker, just like myself, so we looked like a fun little white couple...the only problem being that none of the graduating children were white. Lynn said, "I bet there are plenty of them wondering which child could possibly be ours." So, we had our little chuckle and then the program started. (Beth, meanwhile, was off to the side of the room taking pictures, thus leaving us to look like a couple as she is also a very pasty white cracker--OK, she's actually quite tan, but I still wanted to get in a jab.)

I looked at the program to find the list of graduates, which included Kadayia, A'Ameerah, and Miyah. The teacher's name is Daphaline. That's fun. These poor kids don't have much of a chance at having their names pronounced correctly in Kindergarten and beyond. Anyway, the program was really good and started off with the kids dressed in garb that reflects the career they hope to have when they grow up. Cute little Cameron was a firefighter, courtesy of some last minute--yet brilliant--shopping that Beth and I did yesterday. They did their songs, introductions, etc., and finished that part by dancing the Macarena--yes, the Macarena--before heading off to get into their caps and gowns. (Incidentally, I think most of life's milestones are getting out of control in regards to the money and effort put into celebrations--it's insane.)

While the kids were changing, Miss Dalphaline called upon volunteers to come forward. Several parents did go up. (I must say how impressed I was with the involvement these parents, grandparents, aunts, cousins, etc., have in the kids' lives. It's apparent that they care.) Well, what did these volunteers end up doing? They did exactly what was printed in the program they'd do--the electric slide. Yes, the intermission at pre-school graduation was parents doing the electric slide. It wasn't just the initial volunteers that danced, either. There were people getting up out of their seats to dance with the rest of them once they realized what was going on (they clearly hadn't read their programs).

Immediately, I thought back to Madea's Family Reunion and how they all danced the electric slide in the middle of the yard; then, I remembered an Oprah show where she said that any time black people get together--weddings, funerals, BBQs, it doesn't matter--they inevitably end up doing the electric slide. They even did it during that Oprah show. Today, there were people cheerin' and doing the whole "mmmhmmm" shouts, while a group of parents at the front were totally dancing away. The floor was shaking (not the sturdiest or newest of buildings), people were clapping and stomping, cheering, etc. And there, in the middle on a chair made for a five-year-old, was me...the sole white man looking like most white men watching others do the electric slide: I didn't know what on earth I was watching.

It was an absolute hoot! I feel cultured--much like a pearl--and can now say that I have sat through the electric slide--in a preschooler's chair, no less. Don't count on seeing me actually dance the electric slide any time in this lifetime, but I was indeed witness to its performance. I must say that it was a fun experience to step into the world of preschoolers and the electric slide, before coming back to the office and getting back into my own world. But, for a moment, I got to be like Madea. Hellurrrr!